Easy Fix

I remember being in one of the most vulnerable positions of my life when I wanted to walk out of one of my most impactful relationships. This relationship challenged me in a variety of ways, spiritually, mentally and emotionally. Throughout this time I did not want accountability for my actions, I was blinded by pride and assumed my way was the only way. I wanted an easy fix for everything, on one hand, I knew this relationship was blooming because all my deep rooted issues were gradually revealed. It was clarified that I had many issues that needed to be sorted out. On the other hand I felt this relationship was crumbling because I was fooled into believing relationships are always meant to be peaches and cream. I thought I would be the happiest person because I am dating the man of my dreams. I allowed fear of thinking I was not worthy of love distort my perspective of myself. But what the enemy took from me was restored by the King. The truth is, this relationship is exactly what I need. I tried to leave this relationship on many occasions because of my shame that continued to pile up. All my flaws surfaced and I did not know how to fix it. I knew I wanted to embrace the optimistic version of me but fear crippled me. I did not tap out of this mindset until I got sick and tired of running in circles. Making the same poor decisions and expecting a solution. I became aware that there is no such thing as an easy fix. I finally humbled myself and asked God to intervene, from that moment on my life changed. My issues did not go away but God gave me guidance on how to manage my battles. I can honestly say, His peace goes before me. My word for today is, focus on the King.