Before I made the decision to dedicate my life to the King I lived a life of confusion and dishonesty. I had a blurred vision of who I was born to be. I didn't see an issue with flirting with rebellion, I looked for love in the wrong places, I gravitated towards anything that felt like love. At the time, I had the slightest clue of who the real Jasmine was, the perception of my identity was distorted. I ran to anyone who had the same broken perspective on who they were, it offered comfortability. I was a people pleaser, I did anything for validation. I struggled saying "no" to people. I was mortified of letting someone down because the fear of rejection. I settled for anything mediocre. I was so entangled with confusion I started to believe this is as good as life gets. I thought this is what freedom was all about, clueless to the fact I lived a life enslaved to my flesh. I didn't make the decision to change my life for the better until I came to the realization my poor decisions effected others. Not only was I hurting myself internally but the consequences of my actions carried over to my peers. This led me to change my life around for the better. I was tired of being led by a rebellious soul, it was time to change the cycle. I knew there was a stronger version of me, but I struggled to tap into it. I had this igniting desire to draw closer to God. By God's grace I was granted with someone who was anointed to stick it out with me through the good, bad and ugly. This is one of many reasons I was influenced to rely on God's truth and refrain from mine.
When I dedicated my life to the King, I began tapping into a knew found freedom, hope, truth, and identity. I willingly exchanged my blurred vision of who I was for the truth of who God says I am. I started to see myself from a whole new perspective. I held myself to a higher standard, I knew I no longer had to rely on people to fill my insatiable void because the more I drank from the cup of the King's throne, the more my heart filled with the word of His truth. I no longer run to people for validation, I no longer have to hide behind fear. I poured out the old, and He continues to pour in the new.
The beautiful part about this journey is that God is limitless, He unleashed a version of me I could not tap into without His grace. He took me out of a ditch full of lies, deceit, and unworthiness and pulled me into a version of Him I never experienced before. I say this because He did it for me, therefore He can do it for you. Will you make the decision to allow God to tap into the unstoppable version of you? The version of you that uses your gifts to impact others?
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